I Dont Know What To Do About You

I dont know what to do. Ever since I started to txt you again those feelings have started to come back. I dont know if I want to get pulled back into all that. Should I take the risk? I mean really I have nothing to lose here. Everytime we talk I get these butterflys in my stomach and I get this huge smile on my face. I know you can make me happy. I want things to work out this time but im not sure if they will because with you there always seems to be another girl. Last time we liked eachother but there was that other girl. I would ask if you saw things working out with us and you said yea in time. That time took to long I waisted so much time waitng for you to make up your mind. I waisted so much time waiting for you to make a decision between someone who was so far away than someone who was right in front of you. You had finnaly made up your mind that you just wanted to be friends with her but by then it was already to late. I had moved on by then and found someone else. Then we broke up and you poped back into the picture again. I dont know mayb this time will work since your not talking to anyone and neither am I. You say you see us together and I want that to happen but I dont know if I can wait around again. When we didnt talk for the longest time I still had those feelings toward you, they never went away. Im confused about it all. Everytime I talk to you those feelings just keep coming back more and more. I have no idea what to do. I want to be with you and you say you see us together but will that really happen? Should I take the risk and see what happens? I still havent made up my mind. =/

What Ever happened To True Friends Being True Friends?

What happened to our friendship? The three of us use to do everything together. We were never apart. That superhero friendship no longer exists. Something happened over the summer but we dont know what it was.Its like you completely shut us out of your life. What ever happened to all the things you said? All the memories we were suppose to make over the summer. We held our part but you let it crumble up into pieces. We tryed to make plans with you to hang out but you always said you were to tired or didnt feel like it. As time came closer for you and Betsy to leave to college thats when you guys started talling again, but what happened to me and you? Ive lost one of my bestfriends that I thought was one of my true friends. I guess I was wrong. Its like you completely forgot about me like I never mattered. I try not to show it but deep down inside it kills me. My heart has a whole inside it that is filled with saddness. What did I do to make this happen because I sure in the hell dont remember doing anything. I miss our friendship and the fun we use to have. Me and Betsy remained bestfriends more like sisters but what happened to you? We both miss you and dont know how to get you back and make it the way things use to be. I dont want to forget about you but damn I guess I have to.

Vans

So many different colors, so many different opptions. Different styles but all the same brand. Vans, thats what I wear. Never a different brand of shoe. Vans is all I have. If you look in my closet all you see is vans. Bright neon green ones, grey ones, black ones, white ones, checkered ones, red ones, yellow ones. I just have so many. You never see me without a pair of vans. They say they are bad for your feet but I don't care. I wear them all the time. Coach stewert tryed telling me I need to stop wearing them cause they are bad for me especially if I run cross-country. All I could think is fuck that shit!! Ill never give up my vans!!Why would I change my shoe style for a sport that I despise so much. Really I'm only doing this sport to stay in shape for basketball. So fuck that I'm never getting rid of my vans!Shoot I'll just keep wearing them around you so it can piss you off cause you know what, no matter what you tell me you can never get me to get rid of my vans! All day everyday I wear my vans. These I will never get rid of. I mean come on now they are just so amazing! I LOVE MY VANS!!

Never Give Up

Never give up on something you can't go a day without thinking about. That's me. I live by this quote. Once I start something I have to finish it. Basketball, I think about it all the time, it's what I do. It's something I can't give up on. It's something I can't go a day without. It's my life, it's what helps me stay stong. My education is important. I want to succeed in life. For my future I want to become a detective, I think about this all the time. It is something that I want to do, want to become, this I won't give up on. My friendship with my bestfriend is important. I never want to lose that friendship. With her gone and away at college it's hard but i have to stay stong. I need to make sure that we keep our friendship. I have to stay strong and know that nothing can take that way. Being stong is life, you have to stay stong in order to get through the problems and struggles you may have in life. That's why I always remember and tell myself you never know how strong you are untill being stong is the only choice you have.

So Confused, I Don't Know What To Do Anymore

I don't know what to do. Your on my mind all the time, I just can't seem to get you out of my head. I wanna be with you, keep being your girlfriend, but I don't know much longer I can keep going like this. Not seeing you anymore like I use to, I can't even talk to you right now cuz you don't have a phone at the moment. It's been like this for a while and I just don't know what to do anymore. Do I stay with you? Do I break up with you? What the fuck do I do? Im tired of being sad all the time, I cant even be my normal self beacuse all I think about is you. I couldn't even have fun at the football game cause the whole time you kept popping up in my head. A friend came up to me asking what was wrong. I told her what was going on, shes never seen me like this before. Talking about you made everything worse. I sat there at the game trying to enjoy it and have fun with my friends but all I could do was think about you. I wasn't my normal self, I felt like crying right then and there. My friend asked me if I wanted to leave cause she was bored of watching the game. When I told her yea she looked at me and could tell something was wrong. I hate that at all I can think bout is you right now, Thinking whether or not I should end it with you. As much as I don't want to I feel like I have to, I feel like I have to in order to feel like my normal self again. I still havn't made up my mind. I just so fucking confused about it all. Your an amazing guy and you make me happy but now that I never see you im always sad and emotional. I feel like crying, I don't know what to do about you. Everyone that Ive asked says I should end it with you. They say im not myself anymore, I know im not myslef, im sad all the time, always bumbed. I don't want to be like this anymore. Maybe it is the best thing for me, for me to just let you go cause I can't take this any longer. I don't even know how im going to do it since I can't even talk to you at the moment. I don't want to end it but I have to, I don't want to lose you but it might just be for the best. It's all so frustraiting, what do I do?